In my last blog I celebrated some brave fathers who really went out on a limb to protect and advocate their trangender kids. Any parent (or anyone, for that matter!) who stands up and insists on integrity for others is so uplifting to me, especially at this time in history. Having said that, there’s a great “dad story” that I forgot to include last time! It’s a really good one, too, so maybe I’m glad I got to devote a whole blog to it today. Happily, this story also provides a great resource for trans girls as well – it’s the story of Rubies, whose motto is “every girl deserves to shine.” Read on to learn more about Rubies!
A few years ago, Jamie and Angela were getting ready to go on a family trip to Central America. As they packed suitcases with their 11 year old daughter, Ruby (a strong trans girl), they realized they had some challenges ahead of them. How would Ruby be able to participate in outdoor fun in another country with confidence and ease? She needed really good swimsuits and undergarments so that she could play like any other kid, wear cute clothes like any other kid, and generally not have to worry about her confidence or safety.
“Wait a minute,” I hear you say, “what does underwear have to do with safety?” Great question!
So, if a trans girl is wearing leggings, a snug skirt, doing dance or gymnastics, or is wearing a “girls” bathing suit, there might be a bulge/poke-out where most folks don’t expect a bulge/poke-out to be. This is where special underwear and swimsuits come in. Compression underwear (sometimes called gaffs) smooth out that bump so that it’s just the small mound that people expect to see. It’s anatomically safe, and if the garment is made well, it’s comfortable and secure as well. This can make a huge difference for confidence, carefree fun, and yes, physical safety.
So, back to our story about Rubies: when Ruby’s parents were faced with this dilemma, what did they do? Holy cow, Ruby’s dad, Jamie, started a clothing company for trans girls! And it’s not just him doing it; the whole family is on board! Jamie designs the clothes and runs the business, his wife Angela runs the social media, and Granny Lina and Papa Stuart help with packing and shipping all of the orders. Amazing!
It really is a truly heartwarming tale. Ruby herself is thriving, the company is growing, and Jamie and his team raise money and contribute to other trans girls in need. A few years ago they raised over $42,000 (Canadian) to send swimwear to trans girls in need! I just love it.
I’ll also go ahead and swear that I’m not on the Rubies payroll, nor do they have any idea who I am. I can say, however, that their products are excellent, and they are helping my daughter feel confident in her clothes as her body changes. I wholeheartedly endorse them!
What I also endorse is the idea of dads, moms, grandparents, friends, extended family, and any caring person getting brave in their love. This kind of celebration of our kids, our loved ones, and the world at large is making things better for people who are struggling to belong and feel validated. And truly, this makes things better for all of us!
One other thing I endorse: the bravery it takes to work through a struggle. Many, many parents struggle a lot when their child does not conform to their expected gender. This can be so painful, both for the parents and for their kids. But there is always a path forward toward greater understanding, closeness, and peace within the household. This is the work that I have dedicated myself to, and I’m here to help you if you need it. Please take a moment and book a complimentary, 20 minute consultation with me to see if you think we’d work well together. You can book here, on my coachbekooy website, or at Nurture Life Coaching. I’m here to help you become your child’s greatest ally.
Thank you to Jamie and all of the other rockin’ parents out there who are paving the way for future joy for all! And thank you to Rubies for being such a source of support for trans girls everywhere!
